As our role moves away from those skills we likely excelled at as an individual contributor, communication becomes the cornerstone of our effectiveness. These skills are not all crucial, but delivering clear and considered messaging, delivering context and inspiration to the team become one of the amplifying skills of managers.

Relationships and Partnerships

Definition

Building and maintaining strong professional relationships both within and outside your organization. This includes networking, creating mutual value, and investing in long-term connections that support your team's success.

Why It Matters

Your network is your net worth in terms of career success and team effectiveness. Strong relationships provide access to information, resources, and opportunities that would otherwise be unavailable.

This Is Strong When:

  • You have strong relationships across different levels and functions in your organization
  • People reach out to you for advice, collaboration, and partnership opportunities
  • You can quickly find the right person to help solve problems or answer questions
  • Your professional network extends beyond your immediate organization
  • Relationships feel mutual and valuable to both parties
  • You invest time in relationships before you need something from them
  • People describe you as well-connected and collaborative

Warning Signs:

  • You only reach out to people when you need something from them
  • Your network is limited to people in your immediate team or function
  • You struggle to find the right contacts when you need help or information
  • Professional relationships feel transactional rather than genuine
  • You don't invest time in networking or relationship-building activities
  • People don't think of you when opportunities arise
  • You have difficulty influencing or getting support from other parts of the organization

Pathways to Improvement:

  • Schedule regular coffee chats with colleagues to maintain relationships
  • Read "Never Eat Alone" by Keith Ferrazzi for networking strategies
  • Join professional organizations and attend industry events
  • Offer help and value to others before asking for anything in return
  • Use social platforms like LinkedIn to maintain and build professional connections
  • Participate in cross-functional projects and initiatives
  • Keep track of important personal and professional details about your network
Communication Excellence

Definition

Effectively conveying information, ideas, and feedback through multiple channels including written communication, ensuring your message is clear, appropriate for the audience, and achieves its intended purpose.

Why It Matters

Communication is the foundation of all management activities. Poor communication leads to misunderstandings, missed deadlines, and damaged relationships, while excellent communication drives alignment, engagement, and results.

This Is Strong When:

  • Your messages are clear, concise, and tailored to your audience
  • People understand your expectations and feel informed about important issues
  • Your written communication is professional, error-free, and well-organized
  • You choose the right communication channel for different types of messages
  • Complex information is broken down into digestible pieces
  • Your communication style adapts appropriately for different stakeholders
  • People feel comfortable asking for clarification when needed

Warning Signs:

  • People frequently misunderstand your messages or expectations
  • You get asked to clarify the same information repeatedly
  • Your emails are either too brief (confusing) or too long (overwhelming)
  • Important information gets lost in poor communication
  • You use the same communication style regardless of audience or situation
  • Written communication contains frequent errors or unclear language
  • Team members seem uncertain about priorities or expectations

Pathways to Improvement:

  • Practice the "pyramid principle": start with the conclusion, then provide supporting details
  • Read "Made to Stick" by Chip Heath for principles of clear communication
  • Use bullet points and headers to make written communication scannable
  • Practice explaining complex topics in simple terms
  • Ask for feedback on your communication style and adjust accordingly
  • Use templates for common communication needs
  • Proofread important written communication before sending
Listening

Definition

Actively and empathetically paying attention to what others are saying, both verbally and non-verbally, while seeking to understand their perspective rather than just waiting for your turn to speak.

Why It Matters

Listening is the foundation of trust, learning, and effective leadership. Leaders who listen well make better decisions, build stronger relationships, and create environments where people feel valued and heard.

This Is Strong When:

  • People feel heard and understood when they talk with you
  • You ask clarifying questions to ensure you understand correctly
  • You notice and respond to non-verbal communication and emotions
  • You can accurately summarize what others have told you
  • People seek you out when they need someone to listen
  • You learn new information and perspectives regularly through listening
  • Your responses demonstrate that you've truly understood what was shared

Warning Signs:

  • You do most of the talking in conversations
  • People seem frustrated or repeat themselves when talking with you
  • You formulate responses while others are still speaking
  • You miss important non-verbal cues or emotional undertones
  • People don't seem to feel heard or understood after conversations with you
  • You interrupt others or finish their sentences
  • Conversations feel rushed or like you're distracted

Pathways to Improvement:

  • Practice the 80/20 rule: listen 80% of the time, talk 20%
  • Read "Just Listen" by Mark Goulston for active listening techniques
  • Put away devices and give your full attention during conversations
  • Use phrases like "What I'm hearing is..." to confirm understanding
  • Ask open-ended questions to encourage people to share more
  • Notice and acknowledge emotions, not just facts
  • Practice mindful listening: focus entirely on understanding rather than responding
Storytelling

Definition

Using narrative techniques to make information more engaging, memorable, and persuasive. This includes crafting compelling stories that connect data to human impact and inspire action.

Why It Matters

Stories are 22x more memorable than facts alone. Great leaders use storytelling to create emotional connection, drive change, and help people understand the meaning behind their work.

This Is Strong When:

  • You can make complex information engaging and understandable through stories
  • Your presentations and communications are memorable and impactful
  • You connect data and facts to human experiences and emotions
  • Stories help illustrate important lessons and principles
  • You can adapt your storytelling style for different audiences
  • People repeat and share your stories with others
  • Stories drive action and behavior change, not just understanding

Warning Signs:

  • Your communications are purely factual without emotional connection
  • People's eyes glaze over during your presentations
  • Important messages don't stick or get remembered
  • You struggle to make abstract concepts concrete and relatable
  • Your attempts at storytelling feel forced or inauthentic
  • Stories are entertaining but don't connect to business objectives
  • You rely only on data without providing context or meaning

Pathways to Improvement:

  • Learn basic story structure: setup, conflict, resolution
  • Read "Made to Stick" by Chip Heath for memorable communication principles
  • Collect stories that illustrate your key messages and values
  • Practice using metaphors and analogies to explain complex concepts
  • Include human impact and emotion in business communications
  • Study great speakers and analyze their storytelling techniques
  • Start presentations with a relevant story rather than jumping into data
Feedback

Definition

The skill of giving and receiving information about performance, behavior, and development in a way that promotes growth and maintains relationships. This includes both positive recognition and constructive guidance delivered with clarity and care.

Why It Matters

Feedback is the fuel for growth and improvement. Teams that receive regular, specific feedback perform 39% better than those who don't. Your ability to give feedback effectively determines whether issues get resolved quickly or escalate into bigger problems.

This Is Strong When:

  • You give feedback regularly (not just during formal reviews) and in real-time
  • Your feedback is specific, behavioral, and focused on impact rather than personality
  • You balance constructive feedback with recognition of strengths and progress
  • People thank you for feedback and seem to implement your suggestions
  • Team members actively seek your input on their performance
  • You can receive feedback about your own performance without becoming defensive
  • Difficult conversations lead to improved performance rather than damaged relationships

Warning Signs:

  • You avoid giving difficult feedback and hope problems will resolve themselves
  • Your feedback tends to be vague ("good job" or "needs improvement")
  • Team members seem surprised by your perspective during formal reviews
  • People become defensive or argumentative when you provide input
  • You focus only on what's wrong rather than also acknowledging what's working
  • You take feedback about your own performance personally or defensively
  • Performance issues persist despite multiple conversations

Pathways to Improvement:

  • Learn the SBI model: Situation, Behavior, Impact - then ask for their perspective
  • Practice the "feedback sandwich" approach: specific positive + growth area + encouragement
  • Read "Thanks for the Feedback" by Stone & Heen to improve receiving feedback
  • Role-play difficult feedback conversations with a trusted colleague or coach
  • Start giving more frequent positive feedback to build your feedback-giving muscle
  • Ask team members how they prefer to receive feedback and adjust accordingly
  • Take notes during feedback conversations to ensure follow-through
Difficult Conversations & Conflict Resolution

Definition

Addressing challenging topics, managing disagreements, and resolving conflicts in a way that preserves relationships while achieving necessary outcomes. This includes having courage to address issues directly rather than avoiding them.

Why It Matters

Unresolved conflicts and avoided conversations create toxicity, reduce team performance, and escalate small issues into major problems. Your ability to navigate difficult conversations determines team health and productivity.

This Is Strong When:

  • You address issues directly rather than hoping they'll resolve themselves
  • Difficult conversations result in mutual understanding and improved relationships
  • You can remain calm and professional during heated discussions
  • Conflicts get resolved rather than going underground or escalating
  • You help others work through their disagreements constructively
  • People trust you to facilitate difficult conversations fairly
  • Team members feel safe bringing up contentious issues

Warning Signs:

  • You avoid difficult conversations and hope problems will go away
  • Conflicts between team members persist or escalate over time
  • Difficult conversations result in damaged relationships or hurt feelings
  • You become emotional or defensive during challenging discussions
  • Issues get discussed privately but never addressed directly
  • Team members complain about each other to you rather than working things out
  • Important topics are considered "undiscussable" on your team

Pathways to Improvement:

  • Read "Crucial Conversations" by Patterson for structured approaches to difficult discussions
  • Practice staying curious rather than getting defensive during disagreements
  • Learn the DESC method: Describe, Express, Specify, Consequences
  • Focus on behavior and impact rather than personality or character
  • Create team agreements about how to handle conflict constructively
  • Practice active listening during disagreements to understand all perspectives
  • Separate people from problems - address issues without attacking individuals